Friday, December 26, 2008
Commissioning Ball

A not too bad dessert but feels a bit cheated. its digestive biscuits =( when they wrote it waffles on the menu... sobz... I have cravings for waffles....

Ohh... What a crowd... Together with the Bridging People & their dates.. can find me?
OCS Commissioning Parade
My dearie who went there with me... ok we were both shaking when shit happens... -_-"
Oops shaky hands... Hope this 2nd LT won't ask me to knock it down... =x hehe...
Friday, December 12, 2008
Prank call...
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Disneyland...
The food there is pricey and not that impressive... but the parade was amazing... the dancers' coordination was really well, and they are so friendly... and it snowed! well, was foam actually. haha... we went there on a really cold day... 12 degrees celsius that day. I believed the temperature was lower at night... even the mickey was freezing... muahaha... so cute!!
Roaming around...
Close up...
I am back!!!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
我不气了。 I'm stress...
attended freddy's birthday on sat. didn't want to go actually. I was so frustrated that I was so frank to the girls. (*guilty*) I just wanted time with ck. Reason - I don't want to see her upset + I'm guilty for not able to have time for him next week, perhaps the whole of december. (and if you are reading this, don't apologise! I am doing it all for you, just want you to be happy if that is what makes you happy.) Just received a 5,000 words (min) assignment with at least 10 citations to be done, and must be done hand-written. lecturer also promised us an upcoming holiday-package for us to spend our christmas - 200qns for that unit. That has yet to include my other 4 units. I am way way behind time... how can I possibly catch up?
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
I am fuming...
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Oh My God!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
I need to find back my motivation!!
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Is life really better at the other side? she seems pretty happy there. lots of pretty photos tells me she is living her life to the fullest now. me? walking backwards while everyone else is moving forward?
Sour Grapes?
I always thought others are more fortunate. They are much better off than me. Do you feel that way too? I always do. Find excuses for myself to indulge myself. Always try to put up a strong front in front of people, but I am actually not ok. have not been able to be as moody lately. have been sick lately. no time to feel moody. Realised how dependent I am. I have lost my usual self. Thinking back, I am different now. wasn't the independent girl that I used to be. Is it a good change? well, not to me. have been so blur lately that I keep doing stupid things. like, tripping myself on my bag? go collect my new passport but didn't bring my current one? meeting friend but didn't tell her the location? Felt so stupid. was scolding myself on the way to meet trans. finally get to have a short meeting with them, but still, short of one. missed those days where the 6 of us got to have a meal together, endless chats with them. missed going to the k box sessions with isomers and the 69 group. haven meet up with many friends for a long time. TKRCY group too. the last meeting with the 69 group was in september. went to 爱琴海民歌餐厅. got their well wishes when I needed support too. Although I didn't specially contact them, I felt so much better when I got their wishes. yes. A simple "how are you?" makes me feel so much better. At least I felt that I wasn't alone or forgotten that period of time. Still working on it though. I am looking forward to the day where I can finally set everything aside and enjoy my meeting with them.
feel so uneasy, guilty for joining in the trip next month. So many things turn up last min. So many make up classes. Don't think I'll be able to cope if i missed the classes. I should really just stand up for myself the other time. so what if i wished for a family getaway? I won't be able to fully enjoy myself when my mind is still thinking about something else? haiz... its too late now. in addition to that, its not even a family thing now. I wish things weren't the same. For the first time, i regretted that things turn out this way.
my sister told me relationship will turn for the better after staying away from each other. Is it true? it is so for her, but not for all cases right? but i hope it will be for me. looking forward to his return. although I am always 口是心非, but i'd still be very happy if he bought me a small little gift. I seem to be a barrier between us now - my thinking too much seems to put him away? I hope he didn't feel that way.
I wish I am stronger, more independent, more decisive, more tolerant, more optimistic and more determined.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Parenting
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Stress
Had a little fun this morning with the kids, but started work soon after brunch. ck didn't notice my message for him, didn't inform me when he was on his way. so I was late. got so frustrated when I couldn't do and the house was so noisy. hate that barney. that purple dinosaur is not even a little cute to me in my perception. it is totally opposite for BinBin. she watched that same disc 3 times. my gosh. so loud too. then my sisters were packing things for my mum, shouting around. then the kids were playing and fighting, with shouts and cries. It really hit my limit. that was what it sparked my tears. yup, my way of venting out my stress and frustrations. bad headache on every sunday.
From IKEA... I think its called Diam Cake. they made from the chocolate into a cake. same chocolate taste! with additional sponge cake + walnut below. NICE!
My favourite chicken rice restaurant @ boon Keng. hehe... my favourite toufu... 10 stars!
someone is peeking at me...
ok we are playing piggies.... he poked damn hard...
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
tired...
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Acceptance
my dad just was referred to the National Cancer Centre, went to see the radiotherapist today. I wanted to go with him, give him some moral support, but my sister objected, she said I should crash classes. went to class today, but can't really concentrate either. kept thinking how is he doing? what did the therapist said? ok probably its the second-hand news already. my mum was probably the first. there's 7 stages for cancer, so my dad is probably at stage 3. so treatment methods will be combination of radiotherapy & chemotherapy.
trying to uphold my positive energy for as long as I can. I can do it last time when he's hospitalised, so can I now.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Thinking back now, I agree with him, I used to be more understanding but not any more when my family is facing such an issue now. Yup, maybe trans is right, somehow men will just take things differently from us. I felt better when she told me this: "If he really can't give you the motivation you want, don't be disppointed. I'm sure he loves you a lot & wanna help, but maybe he didn't know how to." I felt comforted hearing it & especially when she said she likes to see me being so excited & happy talking about him all the while. I realised how selfish I have been. How could I even expect him to do it right in my way when he didn't experience this before and I didn't tell him how to? How I could I lose confidence in him when even trans believe in him. So guilty now. didn't have much time to even talk to him cos he has been rushing here & there for all the exercises since last week. I just hope he will really understand me, what I am going through & not dislike me even for a bit.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
I thought I was better. I finally told some of my dearies about it. They asked at the point of time where I really cannot take it. I really apprecaite them. I told her the other day when she was better, so much better. first time out of the past 2 weeks, I saw her finish one complete meal. I was relieved, and I told her my situation. That day was also my first time that I didn't cry when I talked about it. 也许她是我练习的对象。 I have been thinking when is the best time to tell him about. I really want to see him so badly. so in need of his support, the motivation that he gives me. I know and I am glad that my dearies gave me, but now, I just need his.
I know it is not his fault for making me feel this way. Things just happen at the wrong time. so happen that he is so busy this week. or maybe its fated that I have to learn to deal with all these on my own, learn to be independent again. 早知道我就一大早出去, 就不会一个人在家胡思乱想了。
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
I will stay strong as long as I live...
Please don't ask me anything about this post? thank you.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Cute "little" BinBin
BinBin Posing with her little cute dress that she can't fit into soon...
BinBin posing with 2 balloons
Saturday, October 11, 2008
溏心风暴 (Heart of Greed)
《溏心風暴》- My Love Will Get You Home
《溏心風暴之家好月圓》- Ice-Cream
林峰 - 愛不疚(TVB《溏心風暴之家好月圓》插曲) MV
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Haw Par Villa
白蛇传
状元
I forced him to take a photo with it.. don't they look alike? haha...
花果山